You Know You’re A Pledge When…


10 ) You look like a tool. Your pledge attire resembles a mix of Steve Urkel and The OC.

9 ) Fear of the frat house replaces and overrides the fear of failing out of college.

8 ) While your GPA plummets, becoming a true “frat-star” replaces any college goal previously established.

7 ) You would seriously consider killing that asshole brother who fucks with you most.

6 ) The Greek alphabet replaces the holy bible that you now keep in your back pocket.

5 ) You constantly try and convince yourself that dropping wouldn’t be a pussy thing to do…

4 ) You constantly ask yourself why the hell you’re paying for this.

3 ) You walk as if you have a stick up your ass— most just figuratively, yet some literally.

2 ) You haven’t jerked it in weeks; there just isn’t enough time in the day.

1 ) You chug that beer for hope, rather than taste.

Agreed? Sound off in the comments below.

It’s not hazing. It’s brotherhood.




  1. PledgeMaster says

    Comment all you’d like. If you’re feeling generous, submit a story for consideration. You’ll stay anonymous, and your story might end up as the next post of the PledgeMaster.

  2. Super_Pledge says

    You know you’re a pledge when:

    You can only make left turns, because pledges are never right.

    You’re one of the VERY few wearing a tie in that huge lecture hall class

    You’ve been asked to come to the house late at night in the middle of the week, and were told to bring a pillow case.

    You show up to the library at a certain time of day, everyday and (in some cases) wearing the same color clothes as your pledge brothers.

    The words “six inches” and “bows and toes” are dreaded more than anything in the world.

    You have to spend a week at the house and you’re not allowed to bathe.

  3. superstar says

    You know you’re a pledge when:

    you have to get to campus at 7am to save the brothers tables for lunch

    you know the menu at every on campus restaurant

    Your excited when you get 4 hours sleep

    You can say the greek alphabet before a match burns out

    In the last month you’ve sleep next to the fraternity dog more then next to a girl

  4. Mike says

    You’re sent out to buy a single lollipop… 12 times in a row.
    You’re given back a lollipop for getting an answer wrong… because you suck.
    The guy in the convenience store knows you by your first name and asks you how you’re holding up.
    You have dreams where you’re mopping floors.
    You can say the greek alphabet backwards before a match burns out.
    You know what it means to commune with a house… and it makes it all worth it.

  5. Fredo says

    You have awesome legs because of the squat you held for 4 hours. Every day. For the past sem.

  6. Iwasdisciplinednothazed says

    You know your a pledge when you have to make up excuses as to why your in McDonald’s 3 times a day everyday of homecoming weekend to the person taking your order, and they then preach about your McDonald’s habit, and pray to god that that persons shift is over next time an alumni gets the munchies.

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